Friday 10th January 2014
I am having a moment. It’s a bit of a ‘happy feet’ moment. I’m not dancing, but I am completely happy.
You know that feeling you get when you are on holidays. You eat good food, you meet new people, you take long walks along the beach in the warm summer nights, you try new things and laugh all the time, you dance to 80″s music, (okay – and some 90’s music) you drink as much as you like and sleep until mid day…then do it all again! You feel like all is well with the world and most importantly you feel like all is well with you. This is how life should be. Blissful. Absolutely and utterly blissful.
This is how I feel. Blissful.
Like this is the kind of life I am meant to be living, and I can barely articulate how good it feels. There is that odd feeling, like when you walk into a new house and think, “Yep, this is home.” Perhaps that’s it? I am home.
I know that it’s only 10 days that I have been on this journey, and maybe it is a bit like a honey moon period. It’s all a bit new and different. But I am fascinated by how quickly I am adopting a new way of seeing things, and a new way of being, especially the people I come into contact with every day.
It’s a bit like when you first get your driving licence and you take the car out for a spin all by yourself. Apart from freaking out on the inside, you can still hear your instructor or your parents talking you through every step. “Put your seat belt on. Adjust the mirrors. Put the car into reverse. Take the hand brake off, now take your foot off the brake and …” well you know how it is. Then one day, perhaps without even realising, you stop talking yourself through every step of the journey. Driving a car somehow innate; you and the car somehow become one. You can even have a conversation with another person while you drive! Amazing!
Over the past 10 days my thinking has started to become similar.
I don’t always consciously think, “Okay, what if this person was about to die before midnight?”More often I am just I’ve become better at listening, rather than waiting for the person I am with to draw breathe, and then interjecting with something ‘fascinating’ about me. I’m truly interested in what they have to say. And I am truly happy to be there just for them. Over the past few weeks this has led to so many beautiful conversations and moments, but what is more exciting is how much more vibrant I feel. I literally cannot wait to get up and out into the day. I can’t wait to get to work. I can’t wait to be in the world.
Perhaps this is what flying feels like. Just a little.
It’s definitely blissful, this weird little journey I am on.